8 Tips for Communication Schedules

Divorced parents have communication options that were not available to previous generations. Consider writing a schedule for how and when you will communicate with your children using technology.

1.    Decide on the methods you will use to communicate with your children - telephone, Instant Messenger service and/or webcam should all be considered, depending on your child's age and your available computer equipment.

2.    Specify time frames in which the contact will occur but remember that even though time frames are specified, the parents should agree on a specific time within that time frame for contact, as well as the frequency (how often) of contact.

3.    Keep in mind that younger children need more frequent contact with parents.

4.    The following are suggested time frames and frequency of contact:

• Age 1 - 4 between 6:00 pm and 7:00 pm. Daily.
• Age 5 -9 between 6:00 pm and 7:30 pm. Daily or several times per week
• Age 10 – 12 between 6:00 pm and 8 pm Several times per week
• Age 12+ between 6:00 pm and 9:00 pm. At least weekly

5.    Keep in mind that children's schedules and activities change as they grow. When choosing a timeframe, keep the children's activities in mind as well as both parents’ work schedules.

6.    Also remember that children are often more comfortable with technology than you are. You may have to receive instruction on a particular technology from your child.

7.    You may want to create email accounts on free services such as Yahoo, Hotmail or Gmail that will only be used for parent-child contact. Choose a screen name that is appropriate for your children to see. When creating a screen name for a child it is best not to indicate age (or to use a combination of numbers that appear to be a birthdate or age, i.e., Jane798@yahoo.com, within the name. The Florida Department of Law Enforcement offers child-related computer safety tips. Become familiar with online safety issues.

8.    You will have to agree on a particular service if you agree to use a webcam or Instant Messenger. Some of the Instant Messenger services are combined with webcam capability, which makes the mechanics of contact easier.

Mental health research consistently shows that children who have two parents involved in their lives do better. Consider making a communication schedule to add to your Florida parenting plan.