The collaborative divorce process is said to be more effective because the parties are better able to focus on pertinent issues because stress and anxiety are effectively reduced using the collaborative process. It
was the second reason we gave for using the collaborative process.
There is no question that divorce is stressful and that anxiety abounds during the process. Because the collaborative divorce process focuses on the future, anxiety over the unknown is lessened. By using the collaborative model, you and your spouse each identify your future needs and work toward a solution that meets as many needs as possible for you both.
Anxiety can lead to a break down in divorce negotiations. In an excellent post on the Harvard Business Publishing
blog, Dr. Mark Goulston talked about how to read the signs of anxiety and how to talk to anxious people more effectively. He reports that anxiety pressures the middle brain, causing people to close their minds to what you are saying. He goes on to give tips for identifying signs that your approach is making things worse.The importance of understanding anxiety and how to deal with it, especially during divorce negotiations and mediation sessions, needs to be understood by all those in the divorce process.
So, anxiety closes down the brain. Since one of the hallmarks of the collaborative divorce process is reducing anxiety about the future by actively planning for it, it seems that, at minimum, the collaborative divorce process will truly help you keep an open mind.
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