Collaborative Divorce Law of the Palm Beaches

Why Collaborative Training is Essential

When looking for a collaborative divorce lawyer, pay attention to whether the attorney is trained in the collaborative process. You want to know about the attorney's commitment to the collaborative process and the fact that he or she has actually attended a training is a significant start to assessing the lawyer's commitment to the process.

The collaborative divorce process is not what attorneys are trained to use. In fact, the collaborative process differs in major ways from traditional representation. Lawyers who have not been trained in collaborative negotiation techniques tend to be very uncomfortable by the client-centered method of 4 way meetings. It is very unusual for both parties and both attorneys to sit down together to mediate a traditional divorce case.

One way of determining whether the attorney has received collaborative process training is to search the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals. In order to become a member of the IACP, the attorney must have received the basic collaborative law training in order to join. All the attorney's collaborative training is listed on their IACP profile. You want an attorney trained in the collaborative divorce process.

What is a Four Way Conference?

One of the striking differences in a collaborative divorce case is that the negotiations are conducted in "four way conferences" or "4 Ways" for short. In traditional divorce cases, negotiations are often conducted by the attorneys over the telephone. The attorneys decide what is important and where compromises can be made and then ask for your input.

Collaborative law, by contrast, conducts all the negotiations with the parties present. Because each party is represented by an attorney, there are four people at these settlement conferences. Thus, the name "four way conference."

When you've made the decision to divorce, even collaboratively, there are many issues that need to be dealt with early in the case. These immediate issues are usually the subject of the initial four way - issues like temporary support, living arrangements, temporary time sharing schedules. From there it is up to the divorcing parents to decide the agenda for the subsequent four way conferences.

Negotiating with both parties and their attorneys in person is far different than the typical divorce negotiations. No more attorney calls to "work things out." No more proposed settlements that you had no input into creating other than to say yes or no.  Four way conferences are one of the true differences in a collaborative divorce.

Why It's Difficult to Describe the Collaborative Divorce Process

Collaborative divorce tends to be described to people in terms of the differences with a litigated divorce. Divorce professionals sometimes forget that, for most clients, this is their first divorce. That's exactly what the problem is when trying to describe what's different about a collaborative divorce.

If it's your first divorce and you're reasonably sane, you haven't seen the dirty tricks, power plays and all-out psychological warfare that can accompany highly-conflictual divorce litigation battles. Emptying accounts, freezing credit, locking spouses out of the family business - just a few of the methods of war. The end result is a trail of financial, emotional and personal losses that can be staggering.

Unless you have witnessed the true cost of a battle like this up close and personal, I'm not sure you can appreciate the difference between divorce litigation collaborative divorce process. In collaborative divorces, the parties

• Pledge not to go to court until a full agreement has been reached
• Agree to complete, voluntary financial disclosure to one joint expert
• Have structured settlement meetings with everyone present

Each one of those is the opposite in a litigated divorce. You're in court because some files to start the divorce. A small (or, sometimes, large) fortune of time and money is spent on mandatory financial disclosure. And each of you hires a financial expert to opine about the financial records. The settlement negotiations go between the lawyers. When you go to mediation, each spouse is in a separate room with his or her attorney and the mediator goes back and forth.

Imagine how different it feels to agree to make a reasonable settlement, face-to-face, after cooperating to get all the financial information on the table and to develop the best parenting plan for your kids. The collaborative divorce process really is different.

Collaborative Divorce Television

There is a new internet television station dedicated to Collaborative Divorce. Check it out here.

Florida Collaborative Divorce - Why are We Talking About Texas?

Collaborative professionals are dedicated to assist divorcing couples in restructuring their family and individual lives in a way that minimizes the potential negative effects of divorce. The Texas model seems to be particularly successful.

"The Texas Model" of collaborative divorce process uses a team approach that always includes a neutral mental health professional. The MHP steps out of the therapist role and takes on the role of a neutral  facilitator or "communication specialist" for the team. This helps everyone communicate more effectively. In this role, the communication specialist also helps parties manage the emotions that surface during the divorce process,thereby facilitating negotiations. The specialist is also available to help with parenting plans when needed. The neutral facilitator helps keep the team moving toward the goal of the best outcomes for the family.

Because divorcing couples and their children are affected in three main ways: emotionally, financially, and legally, neutral financial professionals are also common team members in the Texas model. The model requires both parties to be represented by an attorney.The family benefits not only from the skills and knowledge of each team member, but also from the synergy of the team.The acronym T.E.A.M. - Together Everyone Achieves More - is particularly true of the Texas Model of collaborative divorce practice.